i wan't to shared a lil bit love past of mine . well i've chat on bbm just now and my friend nureen and uyien seems so sad , remind their own ex boyfriend while said i miss you ex and i sudden lil bit automatically recall about my first love too and this is it ,the precious my first love past story is begin here
i didn't remember what kind of date and day that time . all i knew is i'm truly deadly fall in love for first time and that's the reason why i call him . my first love --'
to me , he's the best thing i ever had, he makes you the person you wan't to be, instead of the person you are. and all i ever wanted in this world is love and to be loved and he's the one i truly wan't to be with. but after day by day we've have been through , faced the world together and love is eventually fade and all gone he left me behind . we just broke up
i don't wan't to force the situation . i know i deserves this , i have a lot of lacking on myself . i'm not the kind of girl who could make him happy . i'm not !! i just didn't think someone like him could ever love someone like me. he easily gave up on me . it hurts to realize how replaceable i was , i never give up on him that easier.
hey 4 years , remember ? 4years i being such a crying girl all over night , tears always flowing like a rain waiting without tired , act like a sissy girl . afraid to accept the fade .
even in relationship w others guy but still deeply love him even more than anything. everything isn't worthy, in 4 years me learning how to let him go , moving on . do the hardest thing that you won't is sooo fucking hurt i couldn't even describe how was it's feel like , i was there but he were gone leaving all those glimpse of memories. he seems so happy without me and i just watched it with tears on eyes . he only exist when he's need something and then , just left . and now i give up forever to hold it .i may not able to deleted all those memories just like that *snap fingers .but at least i'm moving on STOP giving my all ,stopped being A fool who's living in dreams , i should came back for reality and the reality is our story is end.
i just not leaving in the past anymore. even i have to pretending like everything is gonna be okay. deny all memories came over and hope later or sooner love is not exist anymore
and yeah this is me now . i am student , i tried to making more friends out there . i finally got my own crush .
crush ? well . it's totally complicated to shared and story . i do like him since i saw him for the first time but we can't being couple . i just skip that feeling . i stuck there .
for me now , what the most important is i got real love . love from Allah S.W.T , love from my family and friends . no one could take it from me .
Alhamdulilah.
